Saturday, September 7, 2013

Revenge of a broken heart

I love buying awful looking things. You can do that a lot in Korea. And - for being honest - most of these things might not taste THAT good. Today I found a very special drink. We had a hard start, because it was one of the most awful things I ever drank. But then the empty can and I started some sort of very intensive and short relationship. We broke up in some random trash can in Seoul and now my heart is filled with sadness and hate. Because of that, I'm posting pictures of my ex-can, where it might look fat, strange, unfavorable and/or naked including comments filled with negative energy. Because the Internet never forgets. Hahaha, take this, bitch! (Now I'm feeling sort of sad and might spend the whole night crying or drinking or sleeping or playing PS Vita!)

DO NOT BUY! DO NOT DRINK! It might contain Vitamins, but...

...for being honest: I don't think so. If healthy stuff must taste bad, this drink might be some sort of ultra-healthy. Kind of aid for cancer or something. (And doesn't Mrs. Can look awfully blurry here?)

 In fact, it tastes like some very special sort of shit. Imagine, you collect all the shit you can find, taste it and... (Haha! Lithuanian fingernails! You're not from Lithuania, Mrs. Can! Quite Embarrassing, isn't it?)

...take only the most awful pieces of shit, put them into a mixer and... (I said that I will never ever publish this picture in the evil Internet. What should I say, Mrs. Can? I was most likely lying to you! You look sort of dumb! Haha!)
...add the moldy meat of kittens (only for making you also FEELING bad while drinking) and put the result into a can that looks like in the picture above. (The arrow is pointing right on your belly. And it looks FAT! Hahaha!)

Now I'm feeling sort of bad. And sad. Dear can: 
An emperor without a kingdom to rule. A bloodstream without a heart to beat. 
A prisoner for eternity. That’s what I am without you.

Stop! Brain! Stop! A few pictures of things that taste better:

No comments:

Post a Comment