Back to scientific problems...

Continued working on my paper with the question Do Koreans know how to party? (see some previous entry). Over the past few weeks I proceeded with field research by stumbling into random spots. To lower the tension (as this is serious scientific work and no essay about adventure): There is still no clear answer to this question as I'm trying to work on this paper on the most scientific way possible. So further resources are still necessary. But before I start to prove certain things I will share very important wisdom which is unavoidable when conducting data in crowded places.

Here is the answer to the question How do I go to the toilet in the most efficient way? You could of course use algorithms like A* search to achieve satisfying results but sometimes the capacities of the present hardware may not be enough in certain environments. Just watch Video Resource 1 and read this additional advices:

• When you don't feel sexually attracted to queuing: Avoid the very first line. 
• When you actually feel sexually attracted to queuing: Take the first line and enjoy the ride.

Video Resource 1: How to go to the toilet in crowded places

Okay. So much for the very important beginning. Now to the facts:

Video Resource 2: Jumping and waving hands

Video Resource 2 proves that Koreans know how to jump and to wave their hands. That's an important start so I continued going into more detail by specializing on older people wearing suits:

Video Resource 3: More jumping and waving hands

With Video Resource 3 I rate it as proven that Koreans know how to jump and wave their hands. So a very first step in answering the question Do Koreans know how to party? has been taken. Unfortunately - as mentioned in the very first paragraph - further research is unavoidable.

A kind of magic

Imagine a place that does not exist. Hard to imagine, you think? Actually I've been there. Or maybe not. I don't know - it is fucking magic! Look at this:

When entering this non-existing place the first thing you see is nothing. No people and lots of empty space. But when we took a seat, the magic started to happen:

And then within the glimpse of an eye:

I found this picture within a Zip-File named epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydelläänsäkäänköhän and we actually vanished. In some weird places. Like...

...and...

...and...

(Do not drink and do not eat!)

...and also...

...and quite much more in our imagination! As you may have noticed, this entry is quite uninspired. So I'll just end this whole mess with a random post of a dinosaur action video.

Revenge of a broken heart

I love buying awful looking things. You can do that a lot in Korea. And - for being honest - most of these things might not taste THAT good. Today I found a very special drink. We had a hard start, because it was one of the most awful things I ever drank. But then the empty can and I started some sort of very intensive and short relationship. We broke up in some random trash can in Seoul and now my heart is filled with sadness and hate. Because of that, I'm posting pictures of my ex-can, where it might look fat, strange, unfavorable and/or naked including comments filled with negative energy. Because the Internet never forgets. Hahaha, take this, bitch! (Now I'm feeling sort of sad and might spend the whole night crying or drinking or sleeping or playing PS Vita!)

DO NOT BUY! DO NOT DRINK! It might contain Vitamins, but...

...for being honest: I don't think so. If healthy stuff must taste bad, this drink might be some sort of ultra-healthy. Kind of aid for cancer or something. (And doesn't Mrs. Can look awfully blurry here?)

 In fact, it tastes like some very special sort of shit. Imagine, you collect all the shit you can find, taste it and... (Haha! Lithuanian fingernails! You're not from Lithuania, Mrs. Can! Quite Embarrassing, isn't it?)

...take only the most awful pieces of shit, put them into a mixer and... (I said that I will never ever publish this picture in the evil Internet. What should I say, Mrs. Can? I was most likely lying to you! You look sort of dumb! Haha!)

...add the moldy meat of kittens (only for making you also FEELING bad while drinking) and put the result into a can that looks like in the picture above. (The arrow is pointing right on your belly. And it looks FAT! Hahaha!)

Now I'm feeling sort of bad. And sad. Dear can: 

An emperor without a kingdom to rule. A bloodstream without a heart to beat. 

A prisoner for eternity. That’s what I am without you.

Stop! Brain! Stop! A few pictures of things that taste better:

It appeared to look like football...

...but I was not really sure.

Abstract

We tried to watch some football the other day but all these Koreans were blocking our sight. We weren't able to understand any word, but somehow came to the conclusion that they know how to support their team. Therefore, it might be possible that Asian ladies and gentlemen know how to party. In this paper we're going to find and analyze resources verifying that in an academic way.

Keywords: Football, Snow, Suwon World Cup Stadium, Jumping

Introduction

Do Koreans know how to party? This question appeared being unsolved over the last few decades. Luckily, we discovered footage possibly taken from a football stadium:

Dear readers, I desperately need your help to finish this paper! Are there any certified articles out there or need I find out by myself doing field research and interviews?

This is the real shit

Breaking News!!!!

Warning: Might contain information that changes your life forever.

In Korea there are Koreans.

And Koreans.

And Koreans.

And Koreans.

Also, they have food.

And food.

And food.

And food.

 

And food.

My pants are very talkative

Me: Hello, Pants!
Pants: Huh?
Me: You can talk!
Pants: shhhh...
Me: THESE ARE MY PANTS AND THEY CAN TALK!
Pants: Shut the fuck up!
Me: THESE ARE MY PANTS AND THEY CAN TALK AND THEY ARE VERY IMPOLITE!
Pants: Geez, now you blew my cover! Months of preparation for nothing, thanks a lot!
Me: What are you talking about?
Pants: This is strictly confidental.
Me: Okay, nevermind (maybe we'll find out in later blog posts - cliffhanger!!!). I have a request.
Pants: *sigh* What is it?
Me: My dearest Pants, may I shit in you?
Pants: What? No! I left this dark chapter of my live behind long, long time ago.
Me: Dark chapter? Didn't you mean brown chapter?
Pants: You're sooooo funny...
Me: Dear Pants, your rejection fills my heart with sadness.
Pants: Good.
Me: Is that all you have to say to your disappointed owner?
Pants: Yes.
Me: What about shitting my pants a little?
Pants: No.
Me: I guess you didn't get it. What about shitting *my* pants a little?
Pants: No.
Me: You belong to me, so you need to fulfill all my wishes.
Pants: This is ridiculous. I'm off.
Me: PANTS? HEY, PANTS! WHERE HAVE YOU GONE?

This is the story of how I wanted to shit my pants but they ran away and I ended up in a dark alley naked and talking to myself.

Nine lives of love

Hello my dear reader!

First of all: I love you! Sincerely! You might say Why the heck are you loving me? I just stumbled over this Blog only because I hate the world and spend most of my time reading random stuff about the fun hidden in the mysterious treasure chest called life hidden inside random thoughts of people I don't know and don't wanna know as I already mentioned that I hate the world and therefore hate people and hate fun and hate myself and castigate myself by wallowing myself in all theses characters comprehending things I hate. Or you might say something else. Or nothing at all.

And now I discovered font sizes. The internet is full of miracles. Nevertheless, let's move to the motivation why I deflorated this innocent blog by writing the very first entry:

I love you readers! I purr the whole day (and night) as I'm currently feeling like a cat living my remaining nine lives in good old Austria where each life represents a single day before entering new worlds of adventure and confusion.